Well, this has been quite the week in the news world! From Tay-Tay Swift’s mysteriously trashed fan mail (didn’t hear about that? Well, that’s the entire story, really), to New York’s oversized sodas not actually being banned afterall…it’s been quite the errr, March Madness, for journalists. Well, by the time things were said and done yesterday, it got really serious—
The white smoke appeared and a new Catholic Pope has been selected. He has chosen to go by the name ‘Francis’…St. Francis is commonly known to Catholics as the voice of the poor).
And then there’s this, you know, speaking of money and poor people and such:
A Kickstarter campaign for the Veronica Mars movie has already made its $2 million goal in just 11 hours.
Warner Brothers (parent company: Time Warner) has agreed to produce, market and distribute the flick, but the $2 mill had to come from elsewhere–The $2 mill couldn’t come from a company that is worth $54 billion+! No siree, it had to come from the general population–one which is already struggling to make ends meet and get jobs and pay off student loans. Does Kristin Bell really need average Joes to donate all of that money? Nah, I doubt it! There are plenty of A-Lister, high rolling people in the Hollywood circle that would’ve probably helped to fund a project like that.
However, the people of the world have spoken and they want their modern-day Nancy Drew, to which I just shake my head. *Note: It is said that Amazon Payments–the company which collects the donations that were pledged–takes anywhere between 2-5% of the overall amount donated to the campaign. So, basically, you donors gave Amazon at least $40k.**
Now, before you start thinking that I’m going to launch in to how this money should be donated to the homeless or such, I can tell you that I’m not going to do that. Come on, that’s obvious. It’s way more fun to think of the other, ‘other’ people and things in the world that could use the $2 million + (people are still donating).
So, Who needs to have a Kickstarter campaign worth $2 million?!
Well, the first person that comes to my mind is Annie, from Bridesmaids (Not to be confused with Kristen Wiig). Her clear as day plea, ‘Help Me, I’m Poor’, spawned t-shirts and coffee mugs, while making the rest of us finally happy to hear that we aren’t the only ones! Yahoo!
Mo’ Money = No mo’ bad hair days???
Another person who could use that kinda cash money is Donald Trump. Why, you ask? Well, he is obviously hard up for cash given the fact that he was going to try to take Bill Maher to court for not paying up on that $5 million bet that was made saying Trump should prove that he is not the offspring of an Orangutan. I’m not going to even get into the ridiculousness of the whole thing, but since Mr. Trump does not realize that wasting the time of the court system on something trivial like this is irresponsible on his part, I’d just assume have a Kickstarter campaign to get him to shut up. (Keep in mind, he could also make use of it since he’s filed bankruptcy 4 times on behalf of his various companies.)
You know what I’d do with a million dollars?
2 chicks at the same time….
Remember when Peter, from Office Space, asks his neighbor, Lawrence, what he would do with a million dollars? Even though I’m a chick, I can respect the man’s honesty and say that because of his straight forward, dead pan delivery of ‘Two Chicks At The Same Time’, he most definitely deserves the Kickstarter cash.
Being the Sundance Kid that I am, I couldn’t do a list about people who could use a million dollars and not think of the stars of Lauren Greenfield’s award-winning film, “Queen Of Versailles”. The Siegel’s rags to riches to rags story is disgusting and sad. Due to a bad economy, frivolous spending by Missus Siegel and a few other preventable factors, most of the employees of Westgate Resorts lost their jobs.
Prior to the fall of their business empire, the family had begun to construct the largest house in the US and even as things continue to spiral downward, the spending doesn’t stop. As I write this, I am deciding that it is not the Siegels who need the money, it is the people who suffered the bigger ripples and backlash as a result of their miscalculations and mistakes.
Imagine this: you’re living in a land of make-believe, surrounded by a ditzy giant bird and other giant puppets, and to top it off– you have to live in a trash can. I’m sorry, but wouldn’t you be a Debbie Downer too?? I’m talking about Oscar The Grouch. This poor guy has it rough, you know that a day doesn’t go by without someone throwing a half-full Big Gulp in there. Come on, Elmo got his own show, the least you can do is give this guy a full-sized dumpster…..or $2 million dollars.
If there’s some poor, deserving chap or lady that is more worthy than those that I’ve come up with, please let me know. I’d love to hear whose campaign that you’d invest your cash-money in to help them thrive and survive. In the mean time, I’m going to go watch Veronica Mars in her best role to date, Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
